DAVE: I was in Oakland today [Tuesday]. It's beautiful this time of year. And the fall foliage is nice, too.

JIM: Milt used to say that all the freshman looked so new, like they were wrapped up in cellophane.

DAVE: You've told me that before after I wrote something similar to what I wrote. Being around a university, even at my age, is somehow invigorating sometimes. I would love to teach or work with college students.

Have I mentioned to you that I predict the next head coach of the Dallas cowboys will be . . . wait for it . . . Bill Cowher?

JIM: Bill Cowher, huh? I guess that makes sense in a lot of ways. But I don't see it.

DAVE: You know, ESPN likes to put Hannah Storm front and center when there's a big sporting event, like tonight's Heat/Celtics game. And I firmly believe that Hannah Storm can talk about sports as though she is a man, and not sound like she's been rehearsing, unlike many of the now ubiquitous female sideline reporters in football. But ESPN also puts her out there because older fellas like you and me think she's pretty hot for a woman her age. I know I can't help myself. I don't want to want to bang her, but I just do. It's her flat stomach.

JIM: Yes. Her stomach is flat.

DAVE: I wonder if she's had labiaplasty?

JIM: Does it matter?

DAVE: If I have to tell you, then I guess you're one of the lucky ones.

JIM: I don't feel lucky.