JIM: So, one of the assistant baseball coaches for my son's team died suddenly a couple of days ago. Since it was sudden and unexpected and he seemed like a basically healthy guy, so I assume that it was a heart attack or stroke, or something similar. He was 41.

About two weeks ago, a guy I went to high school with died of a heart attack (although rumor has it that it was possibly cocaine-induced). He was one year younger than me.

About a year and half ago (right around Thanksgiving), my friend Dan from college died of a heart attack. I believe he was a year older than me.

My doctor told me straight out a few years ago that if I don't do something to reduce my cholesterol and triglycerides, that I would have a heart attack and get diabetes. So what did I do yesterday? I ate four doughnuts.

DAVE: Dude, apparently you need to take better care of yourself.

JIM: I just finished eating another doughnut. Cream-filled. Honest.

It was nice knowing you.

DAVE: Lay off the fucking doughnuts. Food at the office is the worst.

JIM: I don't even want a doughnut. But I hate to see them go to waste.

So, no comment about last night's Phillies game?

DAVE: Last night's Phillies game? You mean the kid who got tasered when he ran onto the field?

JIM: There are a lot of doughnuts in our kitchen at work right now. And they will end up being thrown away if I don't eat them.

Yeah, the cop who tasered the kid.

DAVE: Eh, just another day in Philadelphia, I reckon.

JIM: That idiot got what he deserved. I hope the cops beat the crap out of him too.

DAVE: At least he called his father first to ask for permission to run onto the field. That's just good child-rearing, if you ask me.