Just another day at Dr. Cyril Wecht's office . . .

You, there. Yes, you. Listen, uh, I need you to walk my daughter, uh, Ingrid's dog. When you, uh, get back, I'll give you, uh, $25.

Oh, Cyril . . .

Is someone following me? Is it the CIA? I told them what I thought about JFK's assassination. I didn't lie about that. I lied about everything else, but not that. Not JFK.

Was Bessy cloned . . . ?

So, how's YOUR portfolio today?

And just in case you didn't already know . . .

It's never a good idea to fuck with a tiger. Even in a zoo.

She's come a long way from "Mystic Pizza" . . .

Let's see now. What else do I need? There's foundation, blush, eyeliner, lip gloss, concealer . . . yeah, lots of concealer.

That's just cruel . . .

Two buddies just hanging out, talking about oil . . .

"It's good to be the King. I mean, President."

Introducing the Tata Nano . . .

Cool little car. But I think I'll wait for them to come out with the Tata iCar.

I don't need a groundhog to tell me that . . .

A recession is coming. And it's going to be a big one.

Muck the Port Authority . . .

Apparently, the downtown side of the North Shore Connector project (the "Little Dig") is making quite a mess. A lot of muck down there, I hear.

It's deja vu all over again . . .

Lousy special teams, good field position for the other team, and bad interceptions thrown by the quarterback. Yep, pretty much sounds like the recipe for any playoff loss under Bill Cowher. Mike Tomlin is proving to be a fine replacement.

No more boxes for my TV . . .

Just in case there is some confusion amidst my loyal readership, only a small proportion of the American public needs to worry about the transition to digital TV on February 18, 2009. While it seems like everybody is scrambling to get their hands on one of these $40 coupons from the government to help pay for a digital converter box, you don't need a box (or a coupon) if you have satellite or cable TV. You only need the box if you receive television signals through rabbit-ear antennas (kind of like the TV pictured above). And the Nielsen Co. estimates that that is only about 13 percent of the total television households in the nation (and that figure seems to high to me). But for the rest of us, we don't need those new boxes. So, don't print out a coupon. And don't waste your money on a box. You've been warned.